So recently I have had a lot of people come in the shop or ask online or when people stop me to say hello have all been a little side swiped with some info I wrote about in Minty’s update post
I have written about it before but I’ve not really elaborated too much because I’ve been trying to get into the new life groove of things and honestly I have had a super hard year and I wanted to remain in a positive mind-set as much as I could so I didn’t want to go over and over everything and make myself more anxious than I have been.
So incase you weren’t aware, In March this year, Steve and I separated. I don’t really need to go into to too many nitty gritty details because he is my kids dad, we get along really well and I don’t want to be a douchey bitch face, crapping on about stuff that is private and it’s honestly not heavy…Hard yes..but not horrible and evil and hideous. I’m not hiding anything though, there just isn’t really any juicy details to go into.
I don’t want anyone to feel awkward about talking about things with us at all. We don’t feel awkward, so you guys don’t need to either. We both still work in our business and that won’t change because we get along. So don’t stop coming into the shop out of fear of awkwardness. It’s sweet for us. It’s better actually. And you’re allowed to chat to us about it if you want to.
It’s not perfect though I promise and I am finding it hard doing more by myself because of my pain mainly, but Steve helps as much as he can and the kids have adjusted pretty well. It’s going to take time to get it all smooth, but for the most part, we are handling things calmly. EXCEPT FOR THE FUCKING DOGS who are testing my last nerves COCO…read my Instagram for more dog drama
So many people have no clue we are separated still and I guess it will be that way for a while. Not everyone reads my blog or follows on social media, and I don’t really feel like I need to tell everyone every time I chat to people, but we were worried that customers may feel awkward about it all and not come in. Seriously…we NEED you more than ever right now guys. Don’t stop shopping with us out of fear of awkwardness or thinking you need to take sides. We aren’t taking sides, our kids aren’t, so you don’t need to.
One thing people keep telling me when I tell them the news or chat about it being ok and that we get along, A LOT of people will say ‘just wait..it won’t be ok for much longer’ ok firstly Susan…I AM NOT A REGULAR EX, I’M A COOL EX…sorry if you’ve not watched mean girls you will be thinking I’m losing my mind(I am, but it’s a movie reference for those playing at home)….but seriously Susan, I am not like the rest of the population. If you challenge me like that and tell me it ‘won’t be ok’, this natural rebellion that brews within my soul, will fight to the death to prove you wrong. YES, I have no clue what will happen in the future and it may just be shit at some stage, but just because your buddy Janice and her ex are in a custody battle with fire and dragons and machine guns, doesn’t mean our separation will be like that too. Everyone kind of tells you how it ‘should’ be, but I don’t do things the same as the rest of the world, so why would I start now. Steve and I didn’t really fight much when we were married, so why the fuck would I start doing it now. My babies don’t need to go through their parents being separated and see us hating on each other as well.
The other thing people will say is ‘it’s fine now but wait until you guys have new partners’. Steve has already had a new partner, and it was seriously fine. They’ve recently split up, but it was OK with me Susan thank you very much. I would like for him to be happy. And I know he just wants me to be happy. I have told Steve that I have ZERO issue with him having a new partner, the only time he will see the wrath of Jayde, is if he puts a new partner before his kids all the time. Steve was married to me for 12 years. He knows I rarely bring forth the wrath..but He does know how intense it is the 1 or 2 times it comes out a year and how much fire I have for my babies so he knows I was serious when I said, but he is a really good dad (he’s a better dad than I am a Mum, seriously)and has always put his kids first so I am not worried. And he knows I would always put the kids first.
I am not naive to think that it will ALWAYS be like this. Things can change in a second, but I am going to just take it a day at a time. Obviously emotionally it’s been hard for everyone, but considering my anxiety levels over usually much less serious issues, I’ve handled it ok(I think). I can be extremely public about my emotions but I can also be super private about them too when they are too intense. So I’ve just had my night-time meltdowns and got on with it and Thor sleeps VERY close to me. It’s funny how comforting a dog can be one moment and make you want to rip your brain out of your head the next.
We have dinner together as a family about 2 nights a week now, and Steve owns a van that he’s turned into a house and keeps it plugged in at ours some nights so he can be here in the mornings to run the dogs(OR KEEP COCO TO SLEEP AT HIS BECAUSE SHE ATE MY STUFF) and have brekky with the kids…it works for us. So if Susan and Janice are having a hard time with their divorce(I’m sorry they are), It doesn’t mean we will be like that. I believe every couple handles these situations differently. My parents are very friendly even after 20 years of being divorced. My Mums best friends are my Dads brothers wife and my Dads sister. And that has never changed. I know it is a bit more rare, but we will try our hardest to be cool with each other and I hope you guys will be too.
It’s been a fucker of a year. And I would LOVE a holiday right about now…but it’s Christmas…and the dismal retail sales this year need to be wiped the fuck off the planet with great Xmas sales…so if you want to support us in any way you CAN…by shopping with us. Don’t give up on us. We don’t want to be another shop that closes because of divorce and shit sales. We NEED you to survive.
And thank you to those who message to check in on things. I am ok and great at surviving life.